The Shorts

Monday: The book reader at the library got too close and scared Ellie.  She cried (loudly) and uncontrollably for about 7 minutes.  In the library.  With about 30 other kids and moms and she was all we heard…book reader was duly startled.  Deer started eating my bird food from the bird feeder. 

Tuesday: Ellie fell on the pavement and skinned her finger.  I didn’t panic this kind of thing happens to kids who aren’t overprotected all the time.  Chasing deer away from bird feeder by running toward them in my slippers and banging empty watering cans together.

Wednesday:  The skinned finger got really infected.  I learned Bandaids and Bactine terrifies her no less than the book reader at the library.  I learned a bandaid with Polysporin will fall off her finger in a matter of seconds.  

Deer begin to approach me instead of leaving when I run out yelling like a maniac in my slippers.  I refuse to be intimidated.  I stand my ground.  I make direct eye contact.  I growl for good measure.  

The lead deer dips his head at me once, twice, three times but refuses to move away from the feeder.  Is he acknowledging my total infectiveness?  Nodding to my efforts?  What does that mean?

Thursday: Her first gymnastics class.  Too many kids, too loud, too rough.  She got pushed down.  She cried most of the time.  She doesn’t like stamps.  Or inflatable mats.  Or boys.  Or anything loud.  Bubbles make her smile.  She’s a sweet, sensitive baby and I love her.  I wouldn’t trade her gentle spirit for those hyped-up tornado’s for anything.  

Headache so bad I was sincerely worried my brain may leak out my ears.  I glare at the deer from inside the house.

Friday: Unrelenting headache.  Loaded up on painkillers.  Learned I don’t have anything that will make a serious headache go away.  Wine helps.  Watched ‘The Martian’.  Go Science!  Bird feeder empty.  Squirrels complain loudly but nothing from the birds.  Are they even getting any?

Saturday: Headache is going away in stages – am grateful for the periods of pain-freeness.  We see Sam Houston statue in Huntsville.  I’m grateful I don’t live in Huntsville.  

Ellie eats too much hummus.  Tummy troubles follows.  Bird feeder remains empty.  

Bill finally hears the weird clanging noise the truck has been making for a month.  Tells me I need to bring it in to get it fixed.  Slow.  Eye.  Roll.  

I’m asleep by 8pm.

Sunday: Home Depot run.  Fruit tree.  Pepper plants.  Basketball and playing outside.  Refill bird feeder.  Loud, cheerful basketball playing scares deer away.  

Weird bugs bump against the patio door and it sounds like rain.  It isn’t raining.  Will I sleep tonight while I wonder what KIND of bug that is?


Happy Black History Month.  Happy Love Day.  

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