I have a wonderful husband. He is kind, thoughtful, crazy-smart, he makes me hot ginger and honey tea FROM SCRATCH when I’m sick. He emails me at least once a day (usually more) to check in to see how Ellie and I are doing. He is as devoted a son to his father as he is a father to Ellie. He sacrifices. He works hard. He changes the oil in my truck himself. He fixes what’s broken and loves to do DIY projects around the house. Really, is there anything this man can’t do? I’m glad you asked.
Now journey with me to the flip side of all this wonderful-ness. For example, he’s a foodie. Lovely, right? He cooks better than I do. Jackpot! But wait…I’M the one who cooks through the week, as is only fair, as I am home all day with Ellie and he is working outside the home until late in the evening. Keep in mind mom bought me ‘I CAN cook- cooking for dummies…’ book when I was TWENTY-SEVEN. Chicken, rice, and veggies are my go-to meal. Start the rice cooker, throw some chicken in the oven with some garlic powder, and boil some frozen veggies. Then, when I don’t feel so ambitious, it’s frozen pizza, or chicken soup.
Just last night he made this DELICIOUS clam and mushroom dish with pasta and grilled zucchini. For fun.
It would have tasted better too if I had picked up the WHITE wine instead of the red in my hurry to get home from ‘working’ at the yoga studio downtown. ‘Working’ will be explained at another time…
He had to cook the clams in Gin, I think, which still tasted AMAZING. Just think if I had not screwed up the one thing I was in charge of…this is a typical example of what it is like, being a type B personality (really type C) living with a take-charge super-motivated type A person. It’s exhausting for me and probably consistently bewildering for him. HIM (Bewildered) “You mean…you just watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy all day? Again?”
ME (Starting to feel a little judged..) Well, I did FEED Ellie. And I got dressed. Well, I got HER dressed….)
He is bewildered because he would never, could never even IMAGINE wasting a whole day inside watching movies. Literally cannot conceive of it. Had not even imagined there were people who could do it, let alone be MARRIED to one.
I am equally bewildered when he insists each knife is for something different. (THIS one for bread, this one for meat….) Or when he asks why I need ANOTHER pair of black boots. (One is low cut, I need high black boots for winter…heeeelllo!?) I didn’t even respond the first time he asked me why he had to get me a CARD for my birthday. (You’re just going to throw it out after…) Sometimes I think we grew up on different planets. His was and is ‘Planet Logic’ and mine was and is ‘Planet Why-The-Heck-Not!?’
Alas, I firmly (must) believe we even each other out. I slow him down, remind him there are more important things to worry about than dishes in the sink. I make him stop (literally) and look at the pretty Christmas lights. I make him stop his helter-skelter to-do list once in a while so he can breathe, so he can look around and be grateful for what we have.
He has taught me that sometimes things that seem hard to do, aren’t really. Like making spaghetti sauce from scratch. Like making sushi at home. (yep – sushi). We make each other better people, more well-rounded, more interesting in any case, even if we do bewilder each other from time to time.